Breaking free from meth

By Lin, from Arizona

When I was in 8th grade my life began a downward spin I started drink smoking and using pot by the time I was 15 I had discovered meth. I didn’t think I was the typical addicted at the time. I still went to school I had a part time after school job and thought who am I hurting if I’m still in control.

By junior year I was using about an 8 ball a day and still maintaining my responsibilities so still I thought no big deal. My senior year I barely made it through school I was ditching to smoke I was partying with people I should never have been around and even got arrested. I started dating this guy because he got me free drugs and he convinced me to be the driver for him as he stole things to pay for our drugs. Then one day about a month out of high school I found out I was pregnant.

My parents found out about the baby my drugs the stealing and I ended up homeless for a couple months. The guy I was with wouldn’t let me stay with him. I would jump from friend’s house to friend’s house or just walk around all night and sleep in the park. That’s when I realized I had to change. A friend’s mom let me stay with her while I tried to get my life back together.

I thought about the life inside me and wanting to be there for that baby and to give him a good life. So I flushed my stash and crushed my pipe and I felt free. It was hard I was fighting withdrawal and morning sickness but everyday it got easier. My parents came to me and offered to let me come home under the condition that I went to college, stayed clean and took care of my baby. So I did.

Now I have been clean for almost 9 years and it is still hard. I have moments of weakness where I still want the drugs, there were even a few times at the beginning that I slipped but a slip does not mean I would give up. I just started again the next day.

After my son was born I went out with some friends thinking I was ok and I realized I had to let all of my old life go and not look back. Now almost 9 years later I have a great job my own place and a son that whenever I have a weak moment he gives me another reason to fight. It’s hard but every day I wake up and know I am better I am stronger and I won’t let something like drugs control or steal my life.